Monday, January 23, 2012

Bad Jokes

These are actual jokes that came from a set of holiday crackers. I know that those are normally pretty bad, but these really take the cake.

Q. What did the martian say to the petrol pump?
A. Take your fingers out of your ear when I’m talking to you.

Q. What did the mayonnaise say to the fridge?
A. Please close the door, I’m dressing.

Q. What do you get if you cross a parrot with a centipede?
A. A walkie-talkie.

Q. When do spare parts from Japanese cars start falling out of the sky?
A. When it’s raining Datsun cogs.

Q. Where do little fish go each morning?
A. To plaice school.

Q. Why did the boy take a ruler to bed with him?
A. Because he wanted to see how long he slept.

Q. What did the hat say to the scarf?
A. You hang around while I go on ahead.

Q. What did the traffic light say to the zebra crossing?
A. Don’t look now, I’m changing.

Q. Why don’t elephants like penguins?
A. They can’t get the wrappers off.

Q. What did the pencil say to the paper?
A. I dot my i’s on you.

1 comment:

  1. I still can't find the logic in the elephants and penguins joke. These were great.